Deconstructing W? Why bother?

Just did a google blogs search for 'W Bush final press conference' and it coughed up 117, 548 hits. i know the majority of these writers are glad to see W leave DC, and i do support blogging as a form of self-therapy for depression or whatever else ails you, but what more is there to say about this guy after 8 dreadful years of "misunderestimating" him? (In case you're wondering about the non-word there, this was the term W used yesterday when queried on his relationship with the press.) i actually did watch the press conference - yes, all of it and definitely a first for me - a somewhat surreal event, it appeared that W was trying to do an imitation of Josh Brolin imitating him as a down to earth, infantilely reflective kind of guy. He said a lot of ridiculous things, which i'm sure most of those 117, 548 bloggers have all deconstructed ad infinitum; listening to his walk down presidential memory lane was like reliving a bad dream that started in Florida and finished up in the bowels of the US Treasury. The only segment in which he seemed truly sure of himself was in talking about security threats to the US and stamping out terrorism, bringing to mind a psychoanalysis i'd read years ago in which W as an inherently pathological personality was gone over with a finetooth comb. What the psychologist had said was that he is most sure of himself when talking about alpha male priorities: war, revenge, carrying the big stick. Is this what W himself had in mind yesterday when he described himself as a Type A personality? One can only speculate, but why bother? The only truly relevant comment i can offer on the occasion of George and Laura's relocation to Houston is this: have a nice trip and see you in court, and if he's not sure what his new business cards should look like, TV3 in Australia has already solved that problem:

Quickie World News Roundup

As hundreds of bloggers continue to explore the deeper meaning of Iraqi size 10's, Bush has moved on to Afghanistan to shake (rather than hold) hands with President Select Karzai. Some time ago, The Onion did a nice report about W visiting places in the US his policies and incompetence have destroyed (first stop: New Orleans); it seems he's now doing the same for entire countries he's pushed over the proverbial cliff... or maybe he's just trying to get as far away from Obama as possible? (No doubt the Obamas' request for an early move into Blair House sparked a reality check freak out, or maybe it's just that W isn't keen on mixed race neighborhoods.)

The media have finally discovered that drugs provide a way to cope with the tension of living in a war zone, with the high number of Gazans addicted to painkillers and sedatives making the front page on every major daily. (Next week expect an update on heroin addiction in Iraq: Nodding Out While the Conquerers Do Noel.) The Israeli siege of Gaza is apparently continuing in order for the jewish state to make relevant the Hanukah story wherein there rebel warriors had only enough oil to light one little candle a night. Christian zionists like to think that their scriptures will eventually see the light of day in jewish cannon; one supposes that Israelis believe Hamas will eventually embrace the Macabees. Speaking of being holed up in temples, there have been 7 fires in Istanbul mosques over the past 3 days. Although no one has been hurt, it's unclear whether the causes are electrical or arson. Muftis are praying for calm while their prayer books are going up in flames.

Weather events are taking a toll in New England, where 800.000 still don't have electricity, and in France as well, where an estimated 100.000 are without power and at least 3 have died. England and Italy are dealing with floods, Australians are recovering from floods, and Papua New Guinea was struck by flooding brought on by extreme tidal surges. All of these events are, of course, designed to make a martyr out of George Monbiot and an idiot out of Andrea Merkel. While many have touted GPS-phones as one way to reduce the loss of life in natural disasters or other emergencies, the Egyptians are forcing Apple to remove the GPS function from its new iPhone 3G in order to prevent users from engaging in effective terrorist attacks. This is undoubtedly a strategy thought up in the aftermath of the India's 'Not 9/11' Mumbai attacks and is in no way connected with Egypt's on-going crackdown on civil rights of bloggers, gays and whomever else Mubarak doesn't like.

In miscellaneous news, the US entertainment media is apoplectic over Jennifer Aniston's bare all cover for GQ, either because it's taking attention away from her ex's latest interview with Rolling Stone or has redefined the nature of the power tie. Hugh Jackman has been announced as 2009 host for the Oscars, apparently in an effort to reduce the comedy and increase ratings in Australia. With many predicting Sean Penn will win best actor for Milk, the last thing the Academy wants is a lot of gay humor and anti-Prop 8 rants running roughshod over its family value ratings. This segues nicely into the quote of the day, from Adrián Dárgelos of the Argentine group, Babasónicos: Mi arrogancia es una decisión póética. Go Hugh! Go Oscars! And George, have a nice visit in slippered Islamabad.

Duck U Lame Phuck

While i'm sure every other W-disdaining blogger has posted this link, i've gotta add it here. We now know you are more likely to be completely mauled for throwing shoes at an elected official than you are if you smash a pie into their face. i guess this is because shoes are a terrorist weapon, whereas pies are merely wasted calories? Maybe it was the camera angle, but it looked to me like W was actually kind of smiling as he ducked. "I don't know what his cause is.... this is what happens in free societies." That W cannot imagine why someone would do something that, in arab culture, is incredibly insulting, illustrates how totally clueless he is about why people are angry at him. i hope when he gets home from this trip, he'll have a night off to watch Frost/Nixon and think about what it means when a president doesn't take responsibility for any of his actions.

Lame Phuck. Installment #3

Check this out. While the cats are clawing at each other to take control of the henhouse, the foxes who still reign the coop are now trying to pull this stunt: sneaking an article that grants them immunity into a congresionnal bill on detainee treatment. Another coup from the coop! Are they actually going to succeed in getting a democratic congress to agree to this? To agree to let them leave on the 20th January with retroactive immunity from prosecution on war crimes violations? Impeachment was never a plate on Pelosi's table, but this?? Total protection from ever having to be held accountable in a US court for the multitude of egregious, horrific crimes? Lest i seem to be directing all my anger at the democrats, let me add that the audacity of W Dick to even suggest such a piece of legislation (no doubt initiated on the Dick side of the equation) is at once obvious and mind-boggling. Their arrogance knows no bounds.

Also today, Minister of War Gates said he wants to send another 20.000 US soldiers to Afghanistan. Aside from being able to do security at the Afghan Govt-Taliban-Pakistan negotiations, what the hell are these forces going to accomplish in a region which has made it pretty clear that rule by proxy is never going to be acceptable? The Lame Phuck is still pushing his torturous imperial agenda down the throats of the poorest of the poor - one gets the impression that W is happy with Laura, yet he seems intent on fucking over as many people as he can between now and the 20th. (Excuse the strong language here, but in case you couldn't tell, this really really pisses me off!)



In the realm of international law, i'm not sure that a national government's granting of immunity from prosecution of war crimes translates into the International Criminal Court's acceptance of immunity. So if an international body decided to go after Cheney, Wolfie, Rummie and George - and Elliot Abrams - i HATE Elliot Abrams - this US congressional bill wouldn't stop them. Admittedly, i'm not an expert in international law but considering what happened to Pinochet in the UK, it leads me to think these guys would still have to watch their back when travelling outside the US. Pinochet, as i recall, abdicated power as part of a deal in which the Chilean Senate granted him immunity in that country's courts. Doing the quickie wiki check on Pinochet's arrest in London following an order from a Spanish court: it was the first time that several European judges applied the principle of universal jurisdiction, declaring themselves competent to judge crimes committed by former head of states, despite local amnesty laws.

So guys, it's not over till it's over and the law may get you yet.

Lame Phuck #2

Breaking news on the BBC informs us that Pakistani soldiers have taken a stand against US troops attempting to cross the Afghan border into Waziristan. It's about time someone said NO to the Pentagon, but perhaps the bigger issue here is what the Confounder and Thief thinks he's doing by sending US troops into yet another hostile country. As far as i can tell, the objective of the flailing W Dick administration is to destabilize as many countries as possible before they leave office: Iraq, Iran, Georgia, Pakistan, Afghanistan - hard to say who's next on the list but i wouldn't be surprised to read that Cheney's decided to stop over in Baku on his way back from Georgia. (Enticing more Russian troops to set up camp close to the Iranian border may look like a way to put a wedge in Russian-Iranian relations, but Putin is so much cooler and shiftier than W, the chances of seeing the Russians get buried in a meaningless regional conflict that destroys their ties with Tehran seem pretty slim.) The reason for sending more US forces to Afghanistan is now blatantly clear, even while attempts to start fighting inside Pakistan's territory have surely been pulled out of the Bush dynastic ass. One wonders if this will give Sen. Obama pause the next time he waxes urgent about putting his foot down with the Pakistanis. In the long term, Pakistan probably deserves as much of a political overhaul as the US, but in the short term, this isn't gonna happen at gunpoint - one of the many ironies may be that with US forces now grouping along its border and launching attacks inside the country, Pakistan's many internal divisions may actually dissipate under a common banner: US OUT NOW!

Another irony, pointed out in the Times of India, is that if Little Bush opts to go to war in Pakistan, US forces will be facing their own sophisticated weaponry. " In July, the Bush administration sought to shift $226.5 million in US counterterrorism aid for the F-16 upgrades." Pretty groovy, eh? Nothing like having your own misguided missiles come back to kill your troops. Irony No. 3 is that these raids across the border are inciting Pakistani tribes to join forces with the Taliban - or at least that's what they're threatening, according to this report.

That W still has the cajones to say he's made great progress in the so-called "war on terror" goes far beyond being disingenuous. He's either living in a dream world or just rubbing our noses in the fact that we've all be screwed. Impeachment looks increasingly mild, given the havoc this asshole has wreaked around the world.

Lame Phuck Numero Uno

Nothing quite like waking up on a sunny day stretching the muscles savoring the espresso checking out the headlines and immediately wanting to barf. This morning's Guardian has a group of stories covering W's current and final trip to the EU, including Bush voices regret for macho rhetoric in run-up to Iraq war. What the hell? i thought this was the guy who never looks back and knows not the meaning of regret. After 8 years of totally arrogant warmongering, he actually has the nerve to say, "I think that in retrospect I could have used a different tone, a different rhetoric." It seems to me that war criminals who order foreign military invasions as expressions of their unbridled, pathological greed don't have a whole lot of rhetorical options. i mean, isn't that part of the pathology? i recall that at least one psychologist who analyzed W's speech habits concluded The Decider was most self-assured when spewing out threats and accusations. Quoting the Guardian story again: "The phrases he used to win support for the war such as 'bring 'em on' and 'dead or alive' he said, 'indicated to people that I was, you know, not a man of peace.'" Yeah, right George. You're a man of peace like Henry Kissinger was a great diplomat.

What's more accurate is that both of you are among the greatest liars of all time. "'One of the untold stories of Iraq is that we explored the diplomacy a lot,' he said. 'We all wanted to solve this 'disclose, disarm, or face serious consequences' in a diplomatic fashion. After all, I went to the United Nations security council.'" i believe this is an untold story because it never actually occurred. Yeah, you brought your rhetoric to the UN, and every statement you and your lackies made to the wire-tapped Security Council is known to have been totally fabricated in the interests of a corrupt agenda. It's amazing that he still doesn't get it, no? W is a totally lame phuck who's been totally unmasked, truly the emperor oblivious to his own ugly nakedness.

Regarding his replacement, "It's going to be important for the American people to figure out who can handle the task of the 21st century.....It's a challenging job. It requires tough decision making, clear thought, and an experience level." Yes, that's what he said: an experience level. i suppose someone whose most noteworthy experiences were signing execution orders, running businesses into the ground and doing blow in daddy's White House wouldn't be overly anxious to get any more specific regarding what the level should be. Anyone who gets up and goes to work every day has an experience level, for god's sake. Yet for George, it's an irrelevant question: men of faith don't need any experience, God the great equalizer will just tell them what to do whenever there's a fork in the road. Sorry Georgie Porgie, i'm an atheist and have higher expectations of potential employees, a paradigm of the presidency far beyond your lexical experience so i won't bother elaborating. It's tempting to say, "Go back to Crawford and stay there," but then i would be lying, because where you really belong is in a dark, dank prison cell in the Iraqi desert, begging for water.